well well....

... it's been some time, dear readers (but since this page isn't ready for public consumption, the only person who should be reading it is ME (and eden)).

man, some interesting times here in the non-internet world. i don't even think i'm allowed to say on the internet the sort of things that have been happening.

so that's it.

IMPORTANT UPDAETE ON VITMAINS!?!?!!

alert reader eden points out that there is indeed a vitamin K. alert website wikipedia points out that vitamin k doesn't do shit! i corroborated that report by speaking with noted vitamin expert dr. roy g. biv.

me: dr. biv, what can ye tell me about vitamin K?
dr. biv: well schedule one, Vitamin K denotes a group of lipophilic, and hydrophobic, vitamins that are needed for the osttranslational modification of certain proteins, mostly required for blood coagulation. Chemically they are 2-methyl-1,4-naphthoquinone derivatives.
me: can you tell us exactly what that means?
dr. biv: that it doesn't do shit!

so there ye have it, folks... now don't forget to take yer vitamins, except for D which is stupid, and K which is "barely there"

hat tip to EDEN or something.

HERE'S MY POSITION ON TEH VITAMINS:

VITAMIN A: love it, great for yer eyes, rabbits need to take 43059 milligrams a day to maintain cuteness
VITAMIN B (THE WHOLE COMPLEX): THESE ARE MY FAVORITE they're so nuanced and amazing and i love the was they're one big happy family pluswise it's li;ke a frikkin bingo game.
VITAMIN C: the old standard otta have respect for mr. C
VITAMIN D: can suck it. seirously the sun is so stupid it's like the whole flippin' world revolves around it all the time, and besides how the fuck can it beam vitamins into me from 934859043 miles away?
VITAMIN E: the old gray gentleman of vitamins, carry on good sir, you're doing yeoman's work.
VITAMIN K: i seriously thought there was a vitamin K until a few seconds ago
VITAMINwater: was good but it just got bought by coke so screw it

i'll discuss the secret vitmains later but for now i only had 90 seconds to write this so i'm OUT.